turkey lurkey doo...

so I can't forget it for next year, here's this years turkey recipe!

Brine:
Kosher salt
2 bay leaves
1 can chicken stock
brown sugar
maple syrup (the real shit, not the fake corn syrup stuff)

dissolve everything in hot water in the bottom of a cooler. I usually do this with the cooler sitting right in the bathtub. If you're going to do this, warn the other inhabitants of your house that the shower will be out of commission for 24 hours or so...

Add cold water and ice, enough to make the water very cold, and add the turkey. close the lid and leave it alone! I usually check the ice right before bed, add more if needed, and call it a night.

Next morning, drain the turkey, and rub with:
1 stick softened unsalted butter
kosher salt
dried thyme
dried sage
cracked pepper

rub under the skin, in the cavity, and outside the skin.

bake at 425 for 40 minutes, then 375 for an hour and a half or so, covered with tinfoil. (note, this is all for a 12 lb turkey)

let rest for about 20 minutes, or until you've finished the sides that you couldn't be bothered doing earlier because you were too busy stuffing your face and watching movies.